Pineapple Support Talks Suicide Prevention, Self-Care (XBIZ)
Read the full article by Zoe Tamara at XBIZ.com
TARZANA, Calif. — Sitting in a room of performers and producers, the reverence of a painful truth reverberated when the question, “How many of you know someone who has either attempted or died by suicide?” was prompted and a room full of people raised their hands.
Following the string of suicides last year that garnered widespread publicity from mainstream news outlets, British performer Leya Tanit recognized the need for better mental health care in the industry and thus founded Pineapple Support.
In the past year, the nonprofit has been able to provide care for over 100 performers and the numbers are only growing.
While the Pineapple Support team has plans for expansion, yesterday’s event was an eye-opener. If one thing was clear, it’s that this is a community in crisis. While the event provided suicide prevention and self-care training, it was perhaps more importantly an open discussion on the root causes of depression, anxiety and suicide.
While untreated depression is officially the leading cause of suicide, we have to look closely at the factors that have contributed to it within the industry.
Perhaps the most obvious and most controversial factor has been the rise of social media.
“It used to be that everyone got together — there were only a few production companies and everyone knew each other,” said Tanit. “Now, you’re shooting stuff individually or you’re at your house camming. People don’t get together any more. There’s no longer that community kind of feel and it’s very isolating.”
However, the loss of a physical community to the online world has had ramifications beyond increased feelings of isolation.
Licensed marriage and family counselor and doctor of human sexuality, Hernando Chaves, whose presentation was in part dedicated to Ames, reminded the group that the need for a sense of belonging is integral to our sense of self-esteem, as outlined in Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. He suggested, “It’s like a domino effect — if you knock over the little self-esteem domino, what are the other ones that follow? If something inhibits your ability to be vulnerable and transparent, maybe you start to pull away from relationships, and then you find yourself alone and isolated and then you feel depressed or anxious…”
He continued to present the concept of “Ikigai,” the Japanese philosophy offering guidance on creating a sense of purpose with regards towards self-fulfillment. “If you find a balance between what you love, what the world needs, what you can be paid for and what you’re good at, you’ll be able to find more meaning in your relationships and work,” offered Chaves.
Amanda Clemens, licensed crisis prevention counselor and national suicide hotline prevention volunteer further encouraged Dr. Chaves’ challenge to check in more with people. “We tend to want to be soft and gentle and skirt around the truth. Don’t do this. Be direct. ‘Do you want to kill yourself? Have you thought about suicide?’ It sounds grotesque but you have to go there.”
Clemens went on to dispel several rumors about suicide. “A lot of the things we’re told in 7th grade health class, like giving away all your possessions or telling people you love them at weird times, don’t usually happen. It’s the things that are really indirect and subtle.” She suggests to look for behavior that is out of character for someone and to look closely at the nuances and subtleties of their online interactions.
Finally, she offered a quick yet comprehensive list of do’s and don’t’s when dealing with a person in crisis:
DO
Assess their desire (Are you thinking of suicide?)
Assess their capability (Have you ever attempted suicide before? Do you have access to a gun?)
Assess their intent (On a scale of 1-5 how likely are you to act on your suicidal thoughts at this moment?)
Offer buffers (Does anyone know you’re thinking of killing yourself?)
Take their thoughts and intentions seriously
Practice active listening
Ask open-ended questions
Build rapport
Express concern and empathy
DON’T
Minimize their pain
Move away from painful topics
Offer immediate assurance
Give advice
Pineapple Support offers pay-what-you-can counseling to active members in the adult industry and 24/7 text support for non-crisis situations. For more information or to become a sponsor, click here.